The other night, big-titted bride convinces me to eat at Country's again. I should have known better (see Part 1), but not desiring a divorce forced me to capitulate the issue. Hoping to not repeat the last experience and subsequent 'hulk-out', we choose a different location. This turned out to not be the brilliant strategy we thought it was, as you will soon read.

We don't have to wait for a seat this time, but when our waiting skank arrives she looks MEAN. Not necessarily ugly, just like she has a bad disposition towards every place outside of her home skank-hood. She gets our drink orders, and proceeds to make us wait to take our order, just like last time. Wifey orders a salad, and when it gets there it's rank. It looks like our skankress went dumpster diving for the lettuce. So we send it back, and she brings another salad. At least this time it looks like she got the lettuce from the TOP of the trash.

Once again, there's an exceedingly long wait for our food. We watch skankarella chat with other customers, prance around, and everything else that is not a requirement of her job. We finally ask, "Where's our fuckin' food?" and she responds with some lame shit about chicken wings taking 20 minutes to cook. Was it a LIVE chicken? Did they have to get it from some crack dealer's back yard in Riverview? Anyway, it's already been more than twenty minutes. Motherfuckers that came in after us are paying their checks, for crying out loud.

Finally, the food arrives. Just to prove she was bullshitting about the cooking time, it's ALL cold. Even the chicken wings that "had to cook". My meat was so dry it more was like eating a napkin someone had rubbed on some meat. The waiting skank wasn't even bothering to check on us for refills or anything. Hell, we had to ask a different skank to see the manager.

But the manager did rule. She was hot for starters, nice, sweet, hot, and obviously not from Auburn. She comped our meal (the waiting skank had to pay), brought us our french bread the skankress never brought us, and actually sounded sincerely upset we had ANOTHER bad experience with Country's. She even made wait-skank apologize, though I don't think she meant it (mad about buying me a meal, maybe?).

There was one high point to the evening, though. Microwaving my food at home and watching Benchwarmers. If you read Nonz's rants about the Columbus little league hysteria and then watch Benchwarmers, John Heder's scene where he gets his player card is ten times funnier! Nonz says almost exactly the same thing about playing against little kids, and still hasn't seen the movie. New nickname - Napoleon Nonzamite!

So if you want some BBQ, get Country's to go. Jim's food is really good, but he obviously doesn't train his skank staff worth a shit. Did I mention the manager was hot?